Posts from — January 2009

powerful poem

i wanted to write a
powerful poem
i wanted to write a
piece that would express
my disgust and mistrust
of society and its puppets
I wanted to arrange
my thoughts
in such a way
that they would convey
my sense of pain
of well-being
my fear of complete
and irreversible
insanity
i wanted to write a
powerful poem
one that would proclaim
my true name
one that would shout
from the tops of the
highest mountains
that I know who I am
but I could not find
my voice
and I had to settle
for one that whispered

temple

my body is
my temple
there are thieves
on the loose
looting
burning
stealing the most
precious things
the stone wall
is crumbling
with age
mistreatment and
neglect
too far gone
for repair
just the counting
of days
until all is lost
is left

my mind is
my habitat
thickly overgrown
with weeds
rain seeps through
the closed windows
every time it storms
the fire has long
gone out
the sacred glowing embers
died away
going through
the trouble to
lock the doors
at night
while there is nothing
left to protect

my heart is
my soul
the only place
that breathes
all the valuables are
hidden from sight

ignorance

ignorance ain’t bliss
while y’all sippin’ on Cris
sayin’ “here a dolla, there a dolla
ev’rybody holla, holla”
please
what you don’t realize
there’s more to the game
10 years from now
how many will remember your name
see first comes those phat beats
to hypnotize our minds
then the girls dress naked
and shake their behinds
while y’all sittin’ chillin’
takin’ a toke
the whole generation’s goin’
up in smoke
believin’ the lies that say
“Thug Lord for life”
makin’ young girls babies mamas
instead of callin’ ‘em “wife”
bringin’ our poor parents
nothin’ but shame
hopin’ on Judgement Day
the Lord forgets your name
corruption runnin’ rampant
no one seems to care
sweetest soundin’ words are
“Live! You’re on the air”
jumpin’ around on stage
lookin’ like buffoons
if y’all bounced any harder
y’all would be cartoons
i’m not violent by nature
but how much more can i take
getting’ tired ‘bout hearin’
how much money you make
and some of y’all ladies
you know it’s a shame
i wouldn’t call my neighbor’s dog
by none of those names
wanna be the illest the baddest
and a sister named Shady
went on the next track
and called herself a lady
the bling it stings
it’s blinding my eyes
and it ain’t real gold
so stop tellin’ them lies
the dreams the drama
you slapped your mama?!
she thought she was the girl of the week
but you laughed and told her
she was just a freak
and if all of this
fails to make you think
to the lowest depths of Hell
i will watch you sink
faster than a diamond
in a bottle of Cris
ignorance ain’t bliss

A testimony written in the voice of any one who has sat and watched, helplessly, as someone they loved was abused.
———————————————-

pain of my sister

girlfriend
look at you
huddling in shame
hiding your face
hoping that no one
points out the mistake
that you make
daily
whenever you return
to the house
that is not a home
staring at the phone
waiting for the call
from your man
that you’re half hoping
would never come
because you’re wishing to be freed
from the choke chain
that suffocates you
cuts off your air supply
makes you want to die
but your family already knows
that inside of your heart
you’re already dead
you no longer make a sound
as he violates your body
rapes your mind
pounds you into submission
curses you
makes you think you’re unworthy
of everybody but him

girlfriend
what
you don’t believe me?
the light inside of your soul
is steadily shrinking
it’s almost curtains for your
your hopes
your dreams
your reality is sucking up
your vitality
we’re losing you
fast
quick
don’t turn around
he’s coming
cover your lips honey
child don’t take a breath
if he hears you breathing
he can find you
wherever you go
just trace your heartbeat
follow the last of your
heavenly glow
you’re cut off from your friends
your neighbors
only know your voice
from your screams

what would you have me do
if i could
i’d take
the beating for you
i cry when you cry
my heart hurts from the pain
i offered you my hand
but you shrugged me off
fearing for my life
if he ever found out
that i was watching
that i knew his evil deeds
his mask is chipped
the pieces are falling
shards of glass
crunched under my feet
i have to walk away
but
i can’t bear guilt
of leaving you in his arms
left with no choice
but to pray
away your from side
remember i love you
and that in my memories
you will always survive

My dear husband, Tasherre D’Enajetic, was featured in the Metro Times. Read, it, visit the site, donate to the family. K. Thx. Bai.

In the Beginning

a word storm swirls
about me
i run
arms outstretched
hands clasped
forming a sort of circle
to catch the letters as they fall
in the beginning
there was communication
and communication
was the way
grunts thumps
hoots cackles
smoke signals
drumbeats
and after that
The Word
spoken written
sung hollered
and whispered
expression of
the personal
carries a heavy heavy
price to be paid
but now
and now
silence
gun smoke
gasoline fueled blazes
red is the color
of the rain
words are the weapons
of weapons
in the beginning
there was communication
and communication
was good
battles could be settled
marriages arranged
blessings bestowed
upon the blessed
but now
and now
the silence is
too loud
to be heard

Today I am presenting a moving piece from a friend of mine. If you do not know the situation in Gaza, you can read about it here.

Five Little Girls (For the Children of Palestine)

I wish that I could tell you more than simply what’s being said
That the onslaught turned itself around when the mortars heard you didn’t make it;
that everything ceased;
That somehow they left a tear in the midst of all the confusion cultivated decimation yet christened retribution
That serenity was left to boys and girls like you
But explosives don’t harbor souls like they cart destruction and
today I’d be lying to you if I said I thought humans are any different
I can’t sum up the courage it takes to be a liar
I won’t cosign or bolster one sidedness
Nor entice you with an apology to your family;
these never suffice.
Or passively pontificate about life after babies born into, now buried along rocketed dilapidations
…Kids who used to cling to swings, musallahs, and schools
And maybe even salvation
I can not sweep it over
Not today;
No, today I can’t be man
And I am not even sure I’m to apologize for man anymore
what I can report is that you are not alone
you are not abandoned
but truth be told I am just as much your loneliness
as I am your perpetrator
I did not fire this rocket nor muffle your sister’s and brother’s screams
simply ask why it took five of you to bring me here
and you will see that I am no innocent,
there is no nobility to be found

What shakes a man from apathy;
Teaches him to crawl again?
Is there any justification for a soul with no reason when you were given full purpose, or shall I take my 99 deaths in your stead?

If they handed me the gun would that make my search any more sanctified?
Justify my own sins?
Could the poorness of my spirit be shooed away clean with the remnants of a richer Palestine?
Tell me if this is what my shoulders should bear
as I look to you for lessons neverminded in academia;
it is today that I am learned of your blamelessness
and weary of the damage wrought on by ego
today I’m scholared in the ritual of remorse, fervor, and passion
Today, I want to cry out that I appreciate with subtle indulgence
that the succulence in freedom is conceived on the embrace of Khadijah
The caress of Halimah,
The trust of Aishah
And the innocence of five little girls…

Democracy is more than legality; it is a shared sentiment
And love is more than an emotion, it is a capacity;
Without that capability we too lie in wait for rescue
under the rubble of broken understanding and archetypal contemplation

If they handed me the camera would that numb the coldness of the bullet?
Stave the direction of chastisement?
Am I now the illustration of your collateral damage
What would make me prouder than to one day stand in front of you all
with the response to this testimony!!!

No you are not alone young tender…
I am no man…
Only the resilience of a child
The blossoms of a future’s rose
The echoes in the myriads of grace and patience
The remembrance of the beginning
Retribution’s first opera
And the smile and applause at the end
All I ask is that one day you share your front door
With the withered souls
Who are still not safe from the reign’s rain.
They need the home you covet
where silence is a measure of faith and ended dread
And I need daughters and sons to name in your wake;
in exchange…

I should change dear Tahrir,
Or mire me in shades of blood and cinder ash;
I want change brave Ikram,
Or drown me in fear and absence’s suggestions;
I can change sweet Samur,
Or leave my affections for a witch’s heart;
I will change precious Dina,
Or share with me a supplication’s suffocation;
I am change beautiful Ayah,
Or bury me under the footsteps you never intended to give away.

And Allah Knows Best!!!

by Nurideen Ibn Bashir

TheLight1984@aol.com

Today is my birthday. My husband informed me that he purchased a domain name for me. (Isn’t he sweet? You can visit him over here ) Insha’Allah, I will be moving soon. Stay tuned for more updates.

EDIT: I have moved! The new address is http://sumayyahsaidso.com Also, in the near future, I will be moving from Blogger.com to WordPress.com, so continue to stay alert.

Happy Birthday to me!

untitled 9

nightmare
awakens me
breathing hard
heart thunders in my chest
i turn my back
on the West
as my forehead smacks the ground
praying intensely
for my God to deliver me
and bless me with strength
to valley for my brother in
captivity

inconvenient love

it is the memory of your pity
that is devastating me
trying to keep
separate
the fantasy
from the reality
that feels like cold water
splashed on my face
it doesn’t matter what you say
the truth is in your eyes
and in the roughness of your touch
you never wanted me

like a bird with clipped wings
trapped in a gilded cage
singing songs for your ears
forcing down my anger
exuding sympathy for you
who was left behind
in the restructuring of love
bound together with me
by some twisted melody
i’ll be the slave to your passion
you can be the saviour
of my sanity
i never wanted you
you never wanted me

dance the dance of
never ending veils
hide away my sins
cover up the fairy tales
that you told me
when you led me to your bed
i let you hold me
because you lied
you did as i asked
so why
does that make me sad
the convenience
of our togetherness
has seen the sun set
from a distant star
i’d never ask you to stay
you wouldn’t stay anyway
we never wanted this